Diet Survivor: Lesson #4

I am writing about the lessons in "The Diet Survivor's Guide" by Judit Matz and Ellen Frankel. Feel free to post your own answer to the activity at the end to my comments.

Lesson #4

Pay attention to your fullness. When you eat from physical hunger and eat exactly what you are hungry for, you will also notice when your stomach feels satisfied.

This is a biggie for me. As I've said, the first two weeks of May were torture. Dr. Wendy Oliver-Pyatt, in her book Fed Up! talks about the anxiety that comes from not eating enough to be Really Full.

According to this website, I was eating an astonishing 4,040 calories to maintain 323 pounds. And let's face it. I wasn't maintaining, I was gaining. That's a huge amount of food. I was used to being Really Full. So Full Enough or just Not Hungry was actually causing some rather severe anxiety.

It took two weeks to get over it. Two weeks for my body to catch on that I wasn't going to starve it. In the past, during the thousand or so diets I've been on, I would normally try to cut my calories to somewhere between 1200 and 1600. Since May I've had a general goal of 2000 calories. At least 90 percent of the time I stay between 2000 and 2500. This seems like a whole lot. But that same website says that I can eat 3000 and still lose weight.

It says that to maintain a weight of 150, I'll need to eat 2600 calories, so I'm not sweating it. Why would I? I'm losing.

I've been making an honest attempt to eat what I'm hungry for. I'll admit that I do still make an attempt to make healthier choices. Low-fat Cherry Garcia frozen yogurt, rather than the full-fat ice cream with the same cherry-chocolate deliciousness. I think that's okay. It took me some time, believe it or not, to come to terms with that. It's okay to make healthier choices--it's not okay to deny myself to the point where I'm eating gallons of Cherry Garcia after attempting to feed my craving pretzels, carrot sticks, brownies, pizza and bologna sandwiches.

For me, the stopping point is when I feel a little full. I'd still like to be able to stop eating just at the point when I'm no longer hungry--but for my mental health, eating those few more bites makes a big impact.

The only time that I eat to the point of being Really Full--but never Stuffed anymore--is when I eat out. Last night Kevin took me to Macayos. I did manage to leave half a taco and at least half my rice and beans behind. But--I was at the point of Not Hungry after chips and salsa and a small bowl of tortilla soup. I ate to Really Full--half a taco and an enchilada. I'm a work in progress, for sure.

The Activity

Write down the sensations of:

Too Full Too full hurts. My stomach feels distended and painfully full. I feel like I can't get a good breath. I feel a little sick to my stomach, both because I'm Too Full and because I'm disappointed with myself.

Not Full Enough Not Full Enough feels like deprevation. It triggers something from my childhood--a feeling of never having enough of anything. Not Full Enough makes me buy the king size package of Reese's Peanut Butter Cups, because two isn't enough. It makes me buy the large popcorn at hte movies, just to be sure I have enough. I have a hard time eating something small--when I eat I want to be Full.

Just Right Just Right makes me feel like a good girl. A little triumphant. I still have a tingle, sometimes (especially at restaurants), of anxiety because my brain wants Just Right to feel like Really Full. Just Right means I've had enough--but not too much. It means that I've stopped before I hurt myself with Too Full. Just Right feels like taking care of myself.