Once Upon a Fat Girl

Tuesday, May 27, 2008

I am the world's worst blogger

I swear. I'm sorry. I get going and then life happens and I end up going too long between posts.

I've decided to weigh myself once a month instead of once a week, at least for publication. My weight is very fluxy and I don't want to get discouraged by that. Anyway, I weighed myself today and I weigh 311. I'm definitely more than on track for my one pound a week goal.

You know it's funny. In the movies or on TV when someone binges, it's an all at once, crazy minute of intense face stuffing followed by waking up surrounded by candy bar wrappers, Big Mac boxes, with a chocolate ice cream beard.

That isn't the way it works for me. When I binge, it's much more subtle. It isn't going to three different fast food restaurants for one meal, it's going to three different fast food restaurants through out the day, and filling in the niches with Reese's Peanut Butter Cups and donughts. It's a constant quest to feel full. And it usually lasts a few days. When I come to, I'm not laying in a pile of my own debris. I'm just very, very full and slightly depressed.

So that's where I was for a few days earlier this week. I struggle with it every time I go to Las Vegas (which is one weekend a month.) You know what I mean. It's the "I don't get to eat this stuff very often, I DESERVE it" syndrome. IDI syndrome: I deserve it. Why do I go there?

I am on the other side of it though, so that's good. And I didn't derail myself.

Another weird thing happened in Vegas. It didn't stay there, either. I got so freaking bloated. I didn't even recognize my feet and ankles, and my whole body just felt incredibly, painfully swollen. Then about two days later I spent an entire day peeing like a racehorse and my weight went down TEN pounds. That's ten pounds of water retention, folks. Yikes. I Googled it, and apparently walking around in the heat can do that to you. It was 105 degrees that weekend in Vegas, so I guess that qualifies! I'm so glad I don't live there anymore.

Starting: 323.5
Today: 311
Lost: 12.5

Here are some pictures I took during my drive down to Vegas:


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