Once Upon a Fat Girl

Friday, September 08, 2006

A Tantrum

Right now I feel as close to depression as I ever get. I don't tend toward depression, so this is an odd and uncomfortable feeling for me.

Looks like we're staying in Las Vegas for at least this school year. We just absolutely can not find a place to live there right now. There is nothing NOTHING for rent. Not even an apartment. Just nothing. We can't qualify for a mortgage to buy a home until we have moved there and have paycheck stubs to prove our income. It's a nasty Catch-22.

I just want to cry. I don't want to be here. I hate feeling trapped, like a fucking prisoner. No matter how hard I try I can't get out of here. *sniff*

God. I hate feeling sorry for myself. I need to pull myself up by my bootstraps and make the best of this. There has to be a best. Somewhere. Right??

Because laying on the floor and kicking my feet, pounding my fists and screaming "it isn't FAIR!" isn't going to get me very far, now is it?

3 Comments:

Anonymous Jill said...

Awww...that does suck! I was so excited for you. BUT I think we always have to remember that everything happens for a reason. You sound like you've already acceped that you'll have to make the best of it. Not fair!

4:22 PM  
Blogger Mrs. Darling said...

sorry about your hosue troubles! I havent moved in almost 18 years and I plan on living in this house another 18! LOL I do hope you find a place you love.

Thanks for visiting my blog. And do come back. I'll bookmark you and keep track of your life via your writings. Looking forward to gettong to know you better.

7:39 PM  
Blogger Chris said...

I have been trying to get out of California and we are still here. I have some idea of how you must feel. I was so depressed when school started again and we are still here. I feel like we are stuck here for another year :(.

2:52 PM  

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